“A couple months ago, I brought up to my mom in a conversation about lies every parent tells their kids, like, ‘Haha, you got me good with that one, mom!’ She proceeded to earnestly insist that it was illegal. Come to find out, my grandpa had also lied to her about it when she was a kid, and she had passed the information along to me thinking it was genuinely true.” —u/_MaddAddam “If you keep masturbating, you’ll go blind.” —u/K333N4N “If you are honest, work hard, are virtuous, and treat people well, you will get ahead in life. It’s bullshit…the people who get ahead in life are almost the exact opposite.” —u/Successful-Thing6068 “I’m sorry, what?” —u/ComesInAnOldBox “That one was real ironic when I was in high school…and had a flip phone with a calculator, only got worse with time.” —u/jsc0098 “You’ll use these math problems in the real world.” —u/Equivalent_Ad8991 “Respect your elders. Not even because they’ve consistently shown respectable qualities, but just because they’re older.” —u/SeekerOfBurgers “That a degree would open all the doors and knowing about politics, history, and general stuff would make me an interesting person and that socializing was a waste of time. Nowadays, I work for a Big Four company, but I have the personality of a boiled potato. And people have the nerve to ask why I don’t have a girlfriend or more friends at 27. Teach your kids social skills. Studying is not everything.” —u/davidmt1995
